I’m feeling about done with Zoom.
Here’s the story I want to share about my Terrible Day when Zoom Interfered. Because that’s what we’re calling it now.
I awakened early to a bright and sunny day. I didn’t accidentally sleep until 11am (like I had only a few days ago), so it was already a great start to the day. Alas and alak, I lay in bed, distracted on social media, for entirely too long, leaving myself rushed to shower, get my coffee, and generally pull my act together for the Zoom meeting we had scheduled at 9am with our church community group.
Long story short…because I tried writing it out and it really is a long story…Zoom wasn’t doing me any favors. No one could hear me when I tried to get involved and add my own thoughts to the conversation. I felt like a fool. In fact, the only time anyone could hear me was when I lost my cool and grumbled loudly, saying, “I can never work these flipping video calls!” That was when my husband yelled down the stairs, “Hey, Honey, you forgot to mute your mic.” (That’s the moment when I was glad I didn’t say something stronger. The small mercies.)
When that ill-fated Zoom call was over we discovered our church’s online service had already started, and during that same minute we lost our internet connection altogether. The rest of the day continued in the same vein.
I was angry with Steve. Impatient with the kids. And generally feeling sorry for myself.
Forget it. I give up.
But I took a deep breath. I sat with my girls at the bistro table out front (which sounds way fancier than it is, but I like to pretend). And oh, when I say “with my girls,” I mean on Zoom. Of course.
I told them about my No Good, Terrible Day that Zoom Ruined (new, improved name). But they love me.
I told them about my grumpy attitude with my family. But they love me.
I told them that I’m dreading the potential weeks (months?) ahead of staying at home. They are dreading it too. And they love me.
Maybe the Terrible Day when Zoom Interfered is actually the Terrible Day when My Sin Interfered.
And my heart softened. And I began to realize that I’d named the day wrongly. Maybe the Terrible Day when Zoom Interfered is actually the Terrible Day when My Sin Interfered.
But with this realization comes hope. Because I don’t have control over Zoom. (God knows!) But I have the ability to speak truth to my heart.
This is the Truth I Tell My Heart:
1. This is Bad. (Repent)
- When we are overly upset or overly sad about something (like Zoom;…like looking bad in community time), that is a sign of a sinful orientation of our hearts. It’s a sign that we believe something else will meet our needs better than God.
“Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love.” Jonah 2:8
I have sinned against God. Repenting means admitting that to him.
2. But God is Good. (Believe)
- The amazing news is that this isn’t a problem that God can’t handle!
“Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord.” Acts 3:19, 20
He will cleanse me and erase my sins. My sin isn’t bigger than my God!
3. Walk With Jesus. He’s Got You! (Fight)
- It will be a daily fight to remember the truth of God’s great love and grace for us. We will be tempted every day to turn to something else to meet our needs and feed our pleasures. But God is at work in us, helping us to follow him!
“And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. …Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” Philippians 3:1-3
Keep my eyes on Jesus. Redirect as needed!
My hearts has been softened and molded by the Gospel. Tomorrow might not be easier. I hope to walk with Jesus and respond with grace when things go wrong. But if I don’t do any better, I’ll take another breath, look at my God, and talk to my heart.
To learn more about the idea of teaching your heart to Repent, Believe, and Fight, watch this video of the Gospel Waltz by Rev. Bob Flayhart.
