Facing Sadness

Click below to listen to this post about facing sadness on the Candidly Kendra podcast:

Two weeks ago we got some bad news that we didn’t expect. It was the kind of news that forced its way into our world while we were minding our own business, and punched us in the gut. It was the kind of news that knocked our feet out from under us and left us on all fours, gasping for air, in an attempt to get our feet back under us.

Maybe I sound dramatic, but I’m just trying to paint a picture for you of how hard this news was, how it felt. Because our feelings matter.

Steve and I have faced trials before. Twelve years ago Steve and I had a sudden, unexpected miscarriage. Then another only three months later. Ten years ago Steve’s dad suddenly died just minutes before he was going to come to our house to celebrate Steve’s birthday. Six years ago Steve’s mom was diagnosed with ALS, and one year later she died in the hospital. And one year ago my mom was diagnosed with aggressive brain cancer.

God never promised us an easy life. In fact, he promised us the opposite.

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33 ESV

But terrible trials don’t get any easier with practice. (Though, after my first miscarriage I admit I got more hardened as I realized the possibility of miscarriage wasn’t just a reality for other women, but also for me.)

When this latest hard thing hit us I faced it rationally and practically. Okay, Steve, what are we going to do? What decisions need to be made? How will we face this problem together? What’s our next step?

I was upset. The feelings threatened my exterior calm, but I pushed them aside in favor of taking care of business.

And then. And then. An angry stranger flipped me off as I fought for calm in the hard story we are walking. (I admit, I never fully understood what that man’s problem was. I suppose he was probably in his own losing fight for calm.) And suddenly, my emotions overflowed. For the next several hours – even days – I wept as I grieved the loss of something important to me.

I had dreaded the emotions, trying desperately to hide them behind problem-solving activity, but as soon as the tears were released, I knew that this would be good. I needed to feel the sadness. I needed to let the hurt out and let God in with his tender, healing touch.

Sadness is not our greatest enemy. Brokenness will not defeat us. Tears won’t melt us. Not as long as we have Jesus Christ, whose own tears of blood underscored the depth of his heartache, and whose shed blood on the cross proved his yearning to heal our brokenness and wipe away our tears once and for all.

So, please, friends, don’t be afraid of sadness. Don’t hide it under a false facade. Don’t numb it. Don’t fight it. Just feel it.

Time and trust in God will heal it.

Don’t be afraid of sadness…
Don’t numb it. Don’t fight it. Just feel it.
Time and trust in God will heal it.

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”
I Peter 5:10 ESV

Are you walking a hard story right now? How can I be praying for you? Please let me know by commenting down below. Or contact me here.